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My boyfriend broke up with me and I begged him to take me back. Now I regret it so much. Why?

Because even you know that no one is worth begging for and losing your mind over. I got dumped before and I held on, begged, fought etc. I regretted it and hated myself even more for it in the end because I did so much more damage to my already broken heart by giving that person chance after chance to make me feel rejected and small. Try to forgive yourself and him so you can peacefully move on and do bigger and better things with your life. :) much love!!

Me and my boyfriend just broke up and my ex who I never talk to told me “sorry y’all broke up” mind you he did me wrong and we used to be on and off why did he say this? Was he jealous?

YUP! I believe he was. The fact that he pays enough attention to your life to know about the status of your relationship and that he reached out to you is a sign that after you moved on he was probably waiting on your new relationship to fail out of pride and ego, or was waiting on the chance for you to be single again in hopes that you would take him back.

I was a rebound for 1 to 2 years. How do I cope?

First I want to apologize that you were misused so cruelly by someone you believed actually loved you but truthfully things will only get better from here. That heartbreak unknowingly prepared you for the true love that God will bring into your life as well as made you a better person in someway. The breakup pains will come but I promise they will end. All you have to do to cope is just hold on and watch God avenge you and turn that situation around for your good. Everything will be okay :)

How do I stop myself from dating as a rebound, meaning the guy I date is rebound?

I mean… this is a question only you can answer. We aren't you.. how would we know how to stop you. You have to find some worth within yourself and some compassion in your heart to not misuse another to get over someone else.

What does it mean if a guy chooses to message me last before he sleep? Does it mean that he wants me to be the last person he talks to or that he prioritized other people before talking to me?

I would think the first one, but I think that's the beauty of just asking. Don't kill yourself with assumptions or waste time asking people for an answer only he could give you. Just ask how he feels about you and where you guys stand, whatever response you get will be an answer either way. :)

I struggle with my self worth. What should I do?

Get close to God so you began to see yourself the way he see you, dive head first into your goals because bettering yourself helps you love yourself, embrace your insecurities, stop trying to deny them, hide them, hate them, or let them hold you back.

Just take it one day at a time.. taking a shower when you feel like shit, telling yourself you are beautiful when you look in the mirror, taking five seconds out of your day to read positive affirmations, and most importantly surrounding yourself with people who see your worth while you work towards seeing it too are small steps that can make so much difference. I believe just showing up for yourself helps you love yourself, because the more you become someone you can trust, the more you’ll fall in love with you and trust the good things you say and feel about yourself !!:)

Do women find it challenging to spot if a man is interested in them?

One thing that I have learned as a woman who has been in my share of failed relationships is that if you have to spot or try to figure out if a man is in interested in you, he's not.

In the past, I used to chase my old boyfriends down, constantly reach out to them first, constantly ask for reassurance, try to find a look in their eye, trying to find sign on their social media.. it wasn't until I got with my fiancé that I realized that when a man wants you he will make it known. My fiancé pursued me first and even before when we were just dating and we broke up for a year he was still reaching out, checking on me, trying to uplift me and be apart of my life. He puts the same effort in now. He would do anything for me and I know it because he does. A man who wants you will make no excuses and will never leave you guessing !!

What are the top five best lessons you've learned from marriage?

Well being that I am only engaged and not married, I’m probably not allowed to talk about this yet.. but one of the best things I have learned while pursuing marriage is to have patience with yourself AND your partner.

Sometimes I think I do everything right and this causes me to be super stubborn and kinda of a “know it all” but I’ve come to have patience with myself when trying to conquer those bad habits and I give that same grace to my future husband. I give him the grace to grow, evolve, fail and learn. Patience I believe is what keeps a marriage together and two people from falling apart. Hope this helped in some way :)

What are the best ways to get out of an argument with your partner so it doesn’t get worse?

Be quiet. literally.

Me and my fiancé went through a season where he would purposely try to start arguments and escalate them. I learned that if he wasn't trying to hear me out or if he was just talking non sense just to say nothing. A person cannot argue with themselves so eventually they'll give in and realize their childish

Can a guy who rejected you because he had a girlfriend still like you?

No.. I think his rejection is a sign that he is not interested and that his girlfriend is a sign that you shouldn't be either !!!

Why are some people so easily hurt by words?

Sometimes It’s who's saying it that hurts and not what is being said. Either way, no one can explain to you why someone could get hurt by something. It could have something to do with their own inner wounds and childhood traumas but regardless, words are powerful and can hurt anyone because they can literally warp the perception we have of ourselves.

How often do you write and does it makes you feel relieved and happy?

I normally write when I feel inspired but because I have been having a creative block mentally I’ve made a commitment to start writing daily and it has made me feel happy.

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Nikeya a.

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